Don't Live in Regret

Got to talk to a friend from years back for the first time in ... well, years. We reminisced about the times we had and began to wonder why times like that seem to fly by leaving a permanent stain in your memory and why it seems that all the fun times have to end. Maybe this happens to everyone. As we get older, our priorities change and our ideas change and we aren't so focused on what we were then but on what we are now. Maybe what we are now isn't as great as we think it is. I had some really good times with him while we were hanging out and I would love to hold onto that, but he didn't seem so keen on it. Maybe our great that we like to remember is the source of regret for others. We are too focused on how we feel about certain thing that we don't take the time to stop and think about how someone else might be feeling about it.

Take the friends who hung out all the time but never dated. One remembers all the great times they had as friends and the other begins to remember and they both share some great fun filled memories where they were having a great time. While one is ecstatic over the memories that have come up, the other begins to think about things and wishes things would have turned out differently, and how their life has changed for the worse since then. This sends this person into a regretful mood and quite possible, depression. The conversation ends abruptly because the other person just simply can't handle it anymore. How is the other person, the one who was happy to remember all that stuff, supposed to feel about the sudden termination of the conversation? It kind of makes them feel well, sort of bad, like they said something wrong. This will be in their thoughts no, wondering what was said that was wrong, and if they will ever speak again. Maybe that is a bit too harsh. A little too dramatic.

What's the difference between a G-spot and a Golf Ball?
A man will actually LOOK for a golf ball!!

Stick With My Head Baby and We Will Go Far!!

So, how does it work when you finally realize that you are lonely and have actually made the decision to begin dating again? Why do we always want what we can't have? Apparently, its some genetic disease, or maybe it's my intuition trying to tell me that I'm not really ready yet. See, I have a crush on someone that I can not possibly have because he is married. I guess I developed this because its safe in my eyes. I won't EVER make a move because of his status which means that I will NEVER have to be rejected and I can admire from afar. I feel safe this way, or maybe that is apart of my backwards thinking. :)

I also realized that someone I used to date years ago is no where near the same person that he once was. I thought for a little bit that he might be the one that I was supposed to be with, then as the months went on (as friends) and the more I spoke to him I realized that he is not a very happy person and likes to complain about a lot. Hearing constant complaining, is totally not my thing. Why are guys so much like children? Can't they grow up and act like an adult for a little bit? Maybe its too hard for them.

Work is going well and the crews are beginning to come on. Things are moving pretty slowly though. We have 6 parks to open up in 11 days and the water is not on anywhere, most of our supplies are not in, pipes are broken everywhere, and there are only 5 people to do it all in this very short amount of time. If it wasn't like this, then it wouldn't be California State Parks. We are just very good at pulling it all together. Got to work in the wind and rain today...groovy.